Deep Breaths
by RainbowGummyBears
Summary: But she could feel her state of mind declining, like she was losing her sanity about as quickly as a well-shot arrow travels. She knew that she couldn't take it any longer.
1. Chapter 1

I. Inhale

"Go if you'd like," Snow said, standing at the edge of the portal next to her husband. He continued to try to meet her eyes, to beg her to come with him. She would refuse, and he knew, but he wanted to try. The amount of hurt in her eyes was killing him. It broke his heart to know that he was doing this to her.

He had promised that he would never leave.

But he had to know what was going on in the Enchanted Forest. He needed to know what was going on at home, and he was grateful that he wasn't the only one that was leaving. A few people had already gone through, but Snow refused to leave their daughter behind since she wasn't going. She wasn't leaving Emma again.

"I love you, Snow." He grabbed her hand, fully prepared and waiting for her to pull away. She didn't. He turned her small body towards him, met her eyes, and pulled her into a long, hard kiss, taking in every last bit of her because he didn't know how long it would be until he'd get to do it again. Worse than that, he didn't know if he would ever get to do it again. He pulled away, holding her face in his hands. She inhaled so much that she felt her lungs fill, and she held her breath.

"I will always find you." And with that, she watched him leave, and the portal closed behind him.

The asphalt of the street where the portal had been seconds before looked virtually unchanged. She stood there, studying it. It was the spot where her husband had left with a promise to find her one day, the same promise he had made countless times and not broken once. She didn't care that there were people watching, none of whom dared come near their princess at such a difficult time. But she could feel her state of mind declining, like she was losing her sanity about as quickly as a well-shot arrow travels. She knew that she couldn't take it any longer.

She was a mess of sobs and tears as she sunk to her knees in the spot where he had said goodbye to her. Her cries echoed through the quiet streets, but she heard the quickened clicks of high heels somewhere behind her getting closer and closer.

"Mom."

Emma.

She felt her daughter wrap her arms around her as she continued to break down in the middle of Main Street, where the remaining members of the community of Storybrooke stood at a distance, not even bothering to pretend that they weren't looking at Snow White, their princess known for being rock solid, who was breaking down.

Snow was so wrapped up in her own thoughts of her husband that it took her a really long time to realize that that was the first time Emma had ever called her "Mom."

"Baby, I'm so sorry…" Snow said into her daughter's shoulder. Emma pulled back and wiped a few stray tears away from her mother's face, which, even after a good ten minutes of just crying and sobbing, was still the most beautiful that Emma had ever seen.

"Mom, why are you apologizing to me?"

"I let him go. You just got your father back, and Henry just got his grandfather—."

"And you only just got your husband back. And that to me seems a hell of a lot worse."

Snow looked at her daughter, realizing just how proud she was of her, before disappearing into her arms again, the sobs worse this time than they were before.

Emma held on.

She held on for her mom.

**Hey you guys. I really don't know what exactly this is. I got really bored the other day when I was supposed to be studying so I wrote this. If it comes out the way I want it to, this will probably end up being a two-shot. I ask for constructive criticism and positive feedback, as my self-esteem when it comes to my writing is low as it is. LOL Thanks guys.**

**-Emma**


	2. Chapter 2

**(A/N) Hey everybody, and can I just...wow. That was the fastest response I've gotten to anything ever. That makes me so happy, and it did give me some inspiration. I intend on making an explanation as to why Charming left, and I hope it's satisfying. This chapter is Snow-centric too, as I had originally planned. Thanks, guys.**

**-Emma**

II. Exhale

Nobody saw Snow for a couple of days, which was understandable. The only person who saw her was her daughter, and it was killing her. Before David had even left, Emma had already made some precautions.

"Henry," she knelt down to her son's eye level the day before the portal opened and touched his shoulder, brushing that little stubborn piece of hair off of his face. "I think you need to stay with Regina for a few days."

"What?" Henry was surprised. "Why? I want to stay here with you and Snow."

Emma knew he meant well. She did. Henry was a good kid, he really was, but it wasn't right to subject an eleven year old boy to seeing his grandmother in the state that Emma was anticipating. She needed to get him out of the situation for a little while, and Regina had been hoping for more time with him. Why not start now?

Snow was in her bed-their bed-for days. She didn't speak. She didn't eat. She just stared. Her little round eyes were blank, emotionless. Her small brown orbs were glassed over and cloudy, like she was just a body with no heart and soul. She looked as though she was feeling nothing. Her daughter knew that it was not true, not even in the slightest.

For days, Emma tried her damnedest to get Snow to eat something, or at least get out of bed for something other than a shower. It really wasn't working. When she was pretty sure her mother had been sleeping, she slipped out and went to Granny's to get her some takeout, hoping that maybe she would eat something that looked more appetizing than Emma's own cooking. Nobody bothered to ask how Snow was. They were afraid, and they could see how drained Emma was when she walked in. They understood. Charming left because those who wanted to go back needed someone to lead them to rebuilding the kingdom, but none of them got why he would go without Snow White.

He obviously intended to come back. He promised her, as they had all heard. But, Snow and Emma almost didn't make it back. What made this any different?

Emma slipped back into the apartment, quickly fixing a hot chocolate with extra whipped cream and cinnamon before putting it on a tray and carrying it to her parents' bed, where her mother was sitting up, hunched over and looking down at her lap, clothed in a tank top that showed off her small arms and her skinny upper body. She looked tired, like she hadn't slept in days, which was true. Emma sat on the corner of her bed, putting the tray down.

"Hey, Mom." Emma said quietly, trying to catch Snow's eye. She looked up, and it was the fastest Emma had gotten her attention. She considered that some sort of progress.

"Hey." Snow's voice cracked a little bit, probably from not being used for a few days. She seemed out of it, which Emma picked up on. Not like she really needed to pick up on it from sight. She could feel it.

"Are you hungry?" Emma asked, pushing the tray a little bit closer to her.

"Not really." Snow remarked lazily.

"Well, could you eat for me?" She didn't mention that Snow hadn't eaten in days, assuming that she wasn't ready to talk about what was going on, and Emma wasn't sure she was ready to talk either. Snow nodded, taking half of the sandwich in her hand and taking a minuscule bite. It was the most Emma had gotten out of her in days. Snow looked over the tray to the hot chocolate, and Emma saw the sides of her mouth twitch upwards and she heard a breath that could almost be considered a laugh.

"Extra whipped cream and cinnamon." She said quietly. Her daughter smiled at her.

"Just how you like it. That's how I like mine." She winked. She watched her mother, studying her every motion. She ate a little bit, but it was the only thing that entered her stomach in days that wasn't a water bottle Emma had left next to her bed. "How are you feeling?" She dared ask.

Her mother sighed and looked back down at her lap, holding the warm mug in her hands where her nail polish remained as perfect as usual.

"It doesn't take being underwater to feel like you're drowning." There was a humorless laugh that came afterwards, like she didn't know what to think about it.

Emma remembered hearing Snow's quiet weeping on nights when she didn't sleep either. She knew that she couldn't fix it for her, but she could try to cushion the blow of not knowing when her husband would return.

It wasn't like he had left her. He'd never do that. He was coming back. He just had something that he needed to do, for the people of the enchanted forest. He was their prince, their leader. They needed him.

So did Snow White.

She pulled her knees to her chest and looked at her daughter, her Emma, studying her face, and she could tell she was unable to come up with what to say to her next. There was another humorless laugh that played in her mind. If she had been in Emma's position, she wouldn't know what to say to her next either.

She reached one hand from where it was perched on her knee and grabbed Emma's hand.

"What do you want to do now?" Emma asked quietly, trying to see how much progress they could make without going too far. And Snow looked down again, taking her hand back from her daughter's. Emma could see the tears forming in her eyes, and she touched her mother's shoulder.

"What will they think of me out there?"

**Okay I know. That was an awful, awful, AWFUL ending. But, look. I had nothing else that was well placed in this chapter and I think that I'm going to keep going because ending it there doesn't really work for me. I'm glad y'all liked the first chapter and I hope you like this too. Thanks, guys.**

**-Emma **


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